Stargazing
By Emmy

Email: emmy7792@yahoo.com
Fandom: Lost
Pairing: Sayid/Shannon
Spoilers: Up to Confidence Man ... with a different ending for that
ep than in canon, clearly, as it is a Shannon/Sayid fic. =)
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I own nothing and seek no profit from this story. No
copyright infringement intended.
Distribution: Emerald Illusions, any Yahoo group or LJ community I
post it to, and any archives assoicated with said communities and/or
groups. Anyone else please ask. I like to know where my stories are
going.
Summary: Shannon sets out to thank Sayid for what he did and ends up
surprising herself in the process, proving that she actually does
have a few layers underneath her shallow exterior.
Feedback: Yes, please. It makes me all happy-like.

A/N: Until I started writing the second paragraph of this fic, I'd
never even thought of Shannon and Sayid as a couple. I like the way
this fic turned out, though ... even if it did catch me off guard. :)

Very special thanks to my team of betas for this fic. Holly, Lar, and
Shona. I don't think any of you realized how unsure I was about this
fic, and if you did, thank you for not saying anything. :)

Fic dedicated to Gabrielle. She knows why.

Enjoy!!

****************************

She had no idea why she was about to do what she was on her way to
do. Boone would probably freak out on her, tell her to stay away from
him because he was dangerous. Hell, half of the island probably would
say the same thing. It occurred to her that there might be some logic
behind their alarm, but she didn't dwell on it. It's not like she'd
let the others' concern stop what she was planning, anyway. She'd
already made up her mind. Sayid had, after all, done what he did for
a reason. For her.

True, what he had done was torture Sawyer, but ... that had been a
long time coming. People rarely ever did nice things for her unless
she tricked them into it, and Shannon believed in repaying favors
when they did, no matter how bizarre the favor. She walked quietly
through the camp over to the spot he had chosen as his own. Hidden
behind his signal fire, Sayid had managed to seclude himself from the
rest of the people on the beach without actually having gone
anywhere.

Shannon walked up to him slowly and watched as he became aware of her
presence. His eyes opened first, as if something had startled him
awake. Shannon knew she had not been making any noise louder than a
whisper and wondered if he had actually been sleeping at all. He
turned his head as she got closer, opening his mouth to speak as she
knelt beside him, but she shook her head. With a finger on her lips
in the universal sign for silence, she met his eyes. Slowly, she
reached out and took his hand, pulling him up with her as she rose
from the sand. She tugged gently and walked off toward the trees,
forcing him to follow her, as she held tightly to his hand.

Shannon led them to a soft spot on the grass and sat down, finally
releasing Sayid's hand. He looked at her, silently questioning, and
she shrugged. "Just wanted to talk somewhere where there weren't so
many ears."

He nodded and looked around. "This is such a place."

"Yeah. It's quiet here."

"You've been here before?"

"Yes," she told him. "But only during the day ... when I need to get
away from Boone. He treats me like a five year old. This spot is
prettier at night."

Sayid sat down on the grass beside her. "Your brother cares for you.
There is no crime there."

"True," she admitted. "But I never asked for so much protection."

"One usually does not."

Again she found herself nodding. "That makes sense, I guess."

He looked at her thoughtfully for a moment before saying, "You did
not bring me here to discuss your brother."

"No," she said softly. "I didn't."

"Why, then?"

Shannon turned to look at him. Reaching out, she tucked his hair
behind his ear and did not fail to notice that he flinched slightly.
She pulled her hand away quickly. It was rare that a man reacted that
way to her, and she wasn't sure how to handle it when it happened.
Choosing to ignore his reaction for the moment, she merely
said, "Thank you."

He shook his head. "No, Shannon. Do not thank me for what I did
today."

She held his eyes. At least he knew what she was thanking him for and
she didn't have to explain. That was a good thing, she thought. "You
could have killed him."

"Exactly," Sayid lowered his head. "I could have."

Shannon blinked for a moment, wondering why she cared that he felt
ashamed for what he'd done to Sawyer. After a long moment of silence,
she whispered into the darkness, "No one, except Boone, has ever
given a damn about me."

Her voice was soft, and she wasn't sure he could even hear her.
Looking up, she saw that Sayid could not only hear her, but was
gazing at her with an intense expression. She held his eyes for a
moment before saying, "I don't know why it bothered everyone so much
that I couldn't breathe. I mean, it never has before. It was always
considered a weakness in my family's eyes. Except for Boone, and he's
always on my side ... in his way. But you cared. For some reason,
Sayid, you cared. So don't tell me not to thank you."

His gaze never faltered. He stared at her, his eyes never leaving
hers, for several minutes. Finally, he blinked, breaking the eye
contact that had held them in its grasp for so long. "I'm leaving in
the morning."

She looked at him in shock. "What?"

Sayid reached out and mimicked her earlier motions by brushing a
strand of hair from her face. "Someone has to explore the island.
Jack is needed here. He's the only one with solid medical training."

"But..." Shannon's voice trailed off. She didn't know what to say,
didn't know how to express what she was feeling. She didn't
understand what she was feeling. How could she explain it to
him? "But, it's dangerous out there."

He just nodded. "Yes."

"Will you come back?"

His eyes softened slightly, she noticed, and he smiled a little. "I
will do my best, Shannon. That is all I can ever do."

She was once again at a loss for words and it struck her how
differently things were unfolding in reality compared to what she had
planned. This was not, by far, what she had played out in her
fantasies when she thought about what would happen when she went to
him. This little side-trip into the woods was supposed to be a simple
thank you. She had planned on bringing him out here, getting him off,
and then going back to the beach to sleep alone. Confessing secrets
about her life and suddenly caring for his well-being were not
supposed to be in the cards. Not at all. And yet...

"Aren't the stars pretty?" she asked.

Shannon watched him look up to the sky at her words. She was smiling
softly when he looked back at her. "When I was a little girl, I used
to ask my Daddy to give me a star for a present. It didn't matter
when ... birthdays, Christmas, Tuesdays... I just wanted a star.
Never got one, of course, but sometimes, when I look up at the sky, I
still wish I could reach up and grab one."

"They are quite beautiful," Sayid said quietly.

Shannon nodded. "Yeah, they are. Do you mind sitting out here and
watching them with me for a while?"

Slowly, Sayid shook his head. "No, I don't mind at all."

They sat in silence, gazing up at the sky, and after a while, Shannon
leaned over to rest her head on Sayid's shoulder. She sighed
contentedly, surprising herself, when he slipped his arm around her
and drew her in closer. She could feel his strength, could feel the
power behind his grasp, and hoped -- knew -- that she was right in
thinking he would explore the island and return unharmed. Somehow,
she knew that was what had to happen. There could be no other way.

"We should go back."

He sounded reluctant, she thought, even though it was his suggestion.
Turning her head and meeting his eyes, she was struck by how handsome
he was. The little voice inside her head that had told her to bring
him out into the jungle in the first place was telling her to kiss
him. And she knew that, if she was going to at all, now was the
moment for it. She didn't though, she couldn't ... it just didn't
seem right anymore to make the first move. She would leave that up to
him. Realizing that, more than anything, was a signal that something
about this was different from all of her other conquests. Something
about him was different. Or, maybe she was. Shannon wasn't sure.
Still though, the question of returning to the beach remained, and
she had not responded to him. She found herself nodding. "Yeah, we
probably should."

They stared at each other for several more long moments before Sayid
pulled away slowly and stood. He was holding out his hand to her but
Shannon paused before taking it. She still didn't know why she cared
that he was leaving; why she cared that he might not come back. Or
why her mind was insisting that he had to come back. As she
took his hand and allowed him to pull her up, she realized she didn't
mind. Somehow, she knew he was just as confused about this sudden
turn of events as she was.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"For what?"

She paused. In truth, she didn't know what prompted her to say it but
it had just felt right. "For everything. Is that a good enough
answer?"

Sayid smiled at her briefly but said nothing. Instead, he wrapped an
arm around her waist and guided her gently back toward the beach. At
the edge the trees, he stopped walking. Shannon looked at him
curiously and was about to say something when he shook his head. She
grinned as he lifted a finger to his lips, silently telling her to be
quiet in the same way she'd told him earlier. He grinned back and
placed his hands on her hips. Pulling her to him, he leaned down and
brushed a kiss against first one cheek and then the other.

Shannon's eyes widened in surprise. As Sayid began to move away, she
reached out and caught his hands with hers before he let go of her
hips. Leaning in, she kissed both of his cheeks and then pulled back,
staring at him for a moment before brushing a soft kiss across his
lips. His hands tightened on her hips once more and he pulled her
closer. Their lips met again and parted, and Shannon moaned softly
into his mouth as he led her tongue in a slow, sweet dance.

She didn't know how long they stood, wrapped around each other. She
had no idea how long they kissed, but one thing was very clear. She
would miss him when he left, and she desperately wanted him to return
safely.

Even if she wasn't supposed to care, she wanted him back quickly.

When she finally made it back to her bed later that night, it was all
she could do not to run back across the beach and throw her arms
around him once more. It took her hours to fall asleep. At least
that's what it felt like. When morning came, Shannon slept well past
the rising of the sun. Sayid was gone by then, and she felt like
crying. She found a note on the sand beside her and only wondered for
a moment where he had found the paper.

She unfolded the letter and smiled as a white, star-shaped flower
fell from the fold. Shannon picked it up and placed it gently in her
lap, gazing at it for a moment before beginning to read.

Shannon,

I will be back. I don't know when, but I will return. Don't fight
with Boone too much while I am away. You know that he is only trying
to look out for you, to protect you, and since I am not going to be
there to look after you, please allow him to care for you, in my
stead.

The night I return, I shall wait for you on the grass in the jungle,
where we were last night. 

Until then,
Sayid

There was no vow of undying love, but she had not expected one. He
did care, though, that much was very clear. He wanted to see her
again, even if it was meant to be in secret. She didn't mind, though.
She just smiled.

He'd given her a star.

End fic. (By the way, there is a sequel in the works...)